Day 13: Health Benefits
GOOD THINGS

Another perfect sermon for me personally. I don't remember the sermon for May the 6th but it sure was what I needed. On Saturday night when my care group leader and my choir cell group leader both called asking if I had any prayer requests I asked both to pray for me for physical strength. Bobby was gone singing and I felt like I needed an extra something to make it through the rest of the weekend. Pastor Davis spoke about getting our nutrition and strength from the Word. We can't get it by just reading the Word. We've got to meditate on the Word. Matter of fact, he gave a scripture reference about a word that literally means, "physical strength for every day living." I probably shouldn't write that down without giving more information but I wanted to move on with getting this journal writing done.

Saw little Christopher Payton this morning before Sunday School. Kelly told me he was diagnosed with muscular dystrophy, so I knew it but when I actually saw him hobbling it broke my heart! I greeted him cheerfully and acted like I didn't notice - is that what I'm supposed to do? Funny, the mother of a little girl with cerebral palsy and I'm asking how to act around a child with a handicap. I learned this past weekend that MD is caused by a selenium deficiency. Large doses of it now might help little Christopher. I'm going to talk to Kelly about it.

I want more power in my life. I want to see results (immediately) when I pray for my children. Tonight I asked God why don't I have more power? I've asked Him before to search my heart but sometimes we don't really mean it, I guess.

Again...my attitude toward Bobby! It's been so long that I've had this underlying attitude like I know more than him. I can act like I agree or respect him but so many times my thoughts and attitude is, "That's a stupid idea" or "my way is much wiser than your way." That's PRIDE, arrogance, selfishness and rebellion!!!

Oh God, I'm crying out to you tonight to change my heart. I don't want those thoughts any more!!!


Day 14: Man Does Not Live By Bread Alone
PEACE

Bobby came home this afternoon. This evening after kids were in bed I apologized to him and repented. He forgave me but he said he didn't think it was that big of a deal. Ha ha ha. Peace.


Day 15: Fasting As A Lifestyle
DESIRES ARE MET

Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart. Psalm 37:4
Of course we've all heard it taught that we should pray that God's desires become our desires. Of course that's true. However, just as God gave us free will and He gave us all different personalities, He also gave us desires and I believe He wants to fulfill our desires. Otherwise, He would have said He will give us the desires of HIS heart.

Now. It says to DELIGHT yourself in Him. Pastor Sarah told us recently that the word desire here means "to be soft and pliable." So I'm thinking about Abraham. He was willing to kill his son for God; the son he'd been promised and waited to receive for 25 years. But God fulfilled Abraham's desires and spared Isaac's life. Abraham was "soft and pliable" in the hands of the Lord, whom he delighted in. If we're willing to give up everything most precious to us to please Him, He'll make sure that not only ourneeds are met but our desires are fulfilled. He's just so good, isn't He?

It got too warm in the house this afternoon. We didn't turn the AC on early enough - didn't want it to run and try to catch up at 5:00 in the evening so we suffered through until the sun went down. I felt TERRIBLE! As soon as it started to cool off I felt much better. Another lesson learned.


Day 16: Fasting To Break Strongholds
CURSES ARE BROKEN

A week ago a girl in choir told me God was going to speak through me and to be ready for it. The first couple of days I was watching but then I forgot about it. Tonight during dinner in the gym before church, a friend was telling me about some therrible and pretty scary things going on with her husband's 16 year old daughter. I made a couple of suggestions but there was always another problem following that. Finally, I blurted out a strong suggestion to here and she stopped. Her face changed and her shoulders dropped. "Thank you!" she said. "I'd never thought of that."

God's so funny. Why does He wait until the last minute? It doesn't matter; He's always on time.


Day 17: Fasting For Your City - Prayer Walking
YOUR NEEDS ARE MET

God continues to meet our needs. Our bank account looks the same, if not better than it normally does.


Day 18: Fasting To Proclaim Liberty And To HaveFreedom From Legalism
SPECIAL. YOU ARE SPECIAL TO GOD!

I left my family behind and went on a road trip with 3 other ladies for some business training. I was able to sit/lay alone on the back seat of the van and spend time in the Word, pray and sleep. They stopped for lunch and I could stayin the van and read and pray. That night they went to the hot tub and I could have more time with the Lord in the room. I really glad I came!


Day 21: Breaking The Fast
SALVATION. ALL YOUR FAMILY WILL BE SAVED!

Dad called me this morning to tell me that my brother didn't show up for work. (They work at the same factory.) He wanted me to call their local sheriff's office to see if I could find anything out on him. He said he'd call back. I thought he was going to extremes but I called so that I could give him a report when he called back. He was relieved to know Joel wasn't in the slammer. Then I told him, "Dad, it was Mother's Day yesterday. Joel is still grieving (mom died in October 2001) and he tried to drown out his sorrows. He's wasted somewhere." Dad seemed a little surprised but considered the idea.

That afternoon we spoke again and Dad had already called the sheriff's office to file a missing persons report. I was very surprised that he was going so far with this. He'd called Joel's friend that he drinks with and the guy rather flippantly said that Joel just had too much to drink last night. But he told Dad where Joel was headed when he left his house. So Dad drove out to Klinger Lake and started looking for Joel's truck. He found him and let me know everything was alright. That's not the end of the story but the point is that today we believe for salvation for our entire family. I know that Joel believes he's saved. But he's not. He believes that God's grace covers his sins - if he considers them sin. But Romans 6 asks, "should we continue in sin that grace may abound? No."

The suggested scripture reading today was Psalm 119 and verse 9 says, "How can a young man cleanse his way? By taking heed according to Your word." I pray Lord, that Your will be done in my brother's life and that the plans you have for Joel would be established and set into motion in Jesus' Name.

I'll probably get up about 4:00 am and started juicing. I'm ready to EAT!!!!